I’m 17 & i buy my clothes from girly shops like New Look & Mk1 but i usually just buy the hoodies, t-shirts & jeans not the skirts, strappy tops etc… cos i’m Skater/Emo. I wear a bit of make-up. I’ve been told that i’m pretty, i’m clean & i get concentration from boys cos i’m quite girly in their company. But when i’m in my girl mates company i feel butch cos my interests vary to theirs – i like different music to them, gray & indie rock. I like the same tv programmes as them like Huge Brother, Desperate Housewives & Friends, but i also mind sci-fi’s & crime which they DEFINITELY do not mind, i like maintenance fit, mountain biking, playing the PS2 & basically doing other stuff that they’d class as too boyish. I was comfortable with myself before i joined their group cos i used to hang around with a load of guys therefore building me feel a small bit feminine at least. Because of these differences i find myself acting more butch, it’s really getting me down & i feel self conscious. Help
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Stop worrying about being “girly” and just start being a woman … at that point you are just you and you really shouldn’t give much of a darn what other people reflect.
why do you feel the need to heap another mark upon yourself. I found that others try to do that enough. You do what makes you comfortable and pleased.
No you are not butch. I am the same way. I only have friends that are guys, because girls are too girly for me. Guys reflect that it’s splendid that I am a “real girl” and act as they do. They reflect it’s cool that I play video games and have a relaxed persona. I don’t find interest in going to the mall shopping or wearing loads of make-up, or talking about shoes. They just call me a tomboy. But I am not insecure about it at all. I am comfortable being the way that I am, and my husband likes it.
give yourself a splendid huge hug! don’t let others choose you shouldn’t be comfortable with yourself….I am the same way….on the inside I am very girly….but…I ride motorcyles, atv’s, dirtbikes….I like to go hunting and fishing, I am a BIG sports buff, but I am not butch or lesbian…..or any of the negative stipulations people come up with for me….my opinion, other people come up with those stipulations cuz they cannot accept who or how I am…their problem…
not ours!
life is to small to worry about those knd of silly things….be pleased being who your are…
GOOD LUCK!!
sounds to me like your not a bit of fluff like these other girls and that’s a excellent thing. Who really wants to spend all their time on their hair, make up and clothes. NOT ME!!!
YO-LITTLE ONE-EASE UP ON YOURSELF–THIS QUESTION AND THE FACT THAT YOU’RE TRIPPIN’ RIGHT NOW ON THIS THANG IS GOING TO BRING A FLOOD OF ‘YEAHS’ FROM PEOPLE LOOKING TO USE YOUR UNSURITY OF THINGS TO ‘TURN YOU’ ONE DIRECTION OR ANOTHER BECAUSE THERE ARE A GREAT NUMBER OF PEOPLE WHO FEEL IT THEIR TASK IN LIFE TO BRING EVERYBODY INTO THEIR OWN CAMP– BUT LET ME PASS THIS ONE BY YOU—-YOU SAID YOU HAD BEEN HAMGING WITH GUYS PRETTY REGULAR BEFORE AND HAD BEEN SOMEWHAT girlie THERE–WELL I’M THINKING YOU PROBABLY PICKED UP ON FAR MORE OF THEIR STUFF THAN YOU REALIZE–AND THAT –STUFF–JUST KINDA BECOME A PART OF WHO YOU ARE RIGHT NOW–ANOTHER VERY IMPORTANT POINT HERE–YOU SAID SOMETHING THAT IS KEY HERE—’it’s really getting me down’–THIS TELLS ME TWO THINGS–YOU AIN’T COMFORTABLE OR DESIRING OF A BUTCH LIFE FOR YOURSELF–AND AS FAR AS BEING DIFFERENT IN WAYS FROM YOUR BUDS–HELL ANY ONE– EVERYONE–IS DIFFERENT FROM EACH OTHER IN VARYING DEGREES–HELL THAT’S WHAT MAKES US SO DAMNED INTERESTING TO ONE ANOTHER–YOU ARE EXPERIENCING A TIME IN YOUR LIFE WHERE ALL THE POSSIBLITIES AND PROBABILITIES ARE TUGGING AT YOU–AND I KNOW THAT YOU THINK YOU HAVE TO GET ALL THIS STUFF SQUARED OUT IN YOUR HEAD IN ORDER TO –GET ON WITH IT–BUT BELIEVE ME–YOU HAVE TIME HERE TO GO WITH THE FLOW AND TO INSPECT ALL THE STUFF AROUND YOU AND WEIGH ALL THIS OUT–GIVE YOURSELF SOME ROOM–AND FOR GOD’S SAKE EASE UP ON YOURSELF–YOU SOUND TO ME LIKE AN OUTRAGEOUSLY ATTRACTIVE-BEAUTIFUL SPIRIT THAT HAS AN UNBELIEVABLY GORGEOUS FUTURE AHEAD–DON’T GO CLOSING DOORS TOO EARLY BY –BECOMING THIS OR THAT–RIGHT NOW–CHILL–FLOW–LIVE–LAUGH AND LOVE–SWEETNESS—-AND I’LL BE OUT HERE THINKING GOOD THOUGHTS FOR YOU ALL THE DAY LONG—-LOL
be you. your opinion is the only one that matters. if you like you, others will too!
It sounds like you are really one of those rare girls that are being themselves. Don’t change because you are apprehensive about being butch. Obviously the guys like you the way you are, if you all of a swift turned up in a small pink skirt and boob tube people would reflect you were in fancy dress. Beccause you are active and particiate in sports, you couldn’t really dress as your friends do. Maybe you will meet more friends whilst doing your leisure activities that like the same things. BUT DON”T CHANGE!!
and stop hanging with people who judge you terribly just for being the person you are. you’re not a butch so dont worry. be pleased.
I’m not Emo or punk but i act like that and i’m definitly not painstaking butch. You just need to find friends that are more like you -not that you cant have friends that arent- because if your other friends arent accepting you for what you are, or are building you feel not excellent, then they probably arent the type of people you need to hang around.
be butch cuz everyone is paranoid
^_^ Relax. Take it simple on yourself. You don’t have to be girly to fit in. I know that for a fact! I’m one of those girls too who shop at girly stores and have girly friends but my interests are different than theirs.
It doesn’t matter if they rather shop while you rather play videogames. The thing that counts is that you all delight in each others company and know that you can be yourself when you’re with them.
You’re not being “butch”, there are a whole bunch of girls out there just like you. Except, they know mentally that they are feminine… maybe not as feminine as others… but they know who they are.
Point is, Friends are there to except you as an individual… they aren’t there to make you one of their clones.
So… SMILE =)
just be who you are.